Friday, May 24, 2013

How Can I Help You Say Goodbye?

After yesterday's frivolous post, I decided to share something more serious with you that was on my mind this week. Whether you want it or not, I am offering you a little walk into my thoughts.

The other day I was thinking about how much joy I get from my family. I know that they love me as well. Those were such happy thoughts! Then, my mind took a U-turn for a bit.

I couldn't leave well enough alone. I was thinking about all that joy and then I thought of how the more we enjoy being together, the more it would hurt to lose one of us. I've known people who feel that is reason enough to no longer get close to another person, or even another pet. It would seem the pain would be more than we could bear.

photo by FrameAngel

The truth is, though, our lives are all full of goodbyes. We may not like it but everything in this life is temporary, even life itself. I don't think that should keep us from fully engaging, though. How sad that would be. 

Growing up I faced a lot of another kind of goodbyes because we moved a lot. That was also hard and also sad. Goodbyes are not my favorite thing. However, I survived them all. I was able to be happy and joyful again, even when I missed friends or relatives. 

I used to hear a song from time to time that really moved me. No kidding, sometimes you just need some good Country Music to spell it all out for you. The song I am talking about is How Can I Help You Say Goodbye? It was recorded by Patty Loveless, written by Burton Collins and Karen Taylor-Good. According to Wikipedia, the words were spoken to Burton Collins by his grandmother, preparing him for her death. Click on the name to hear it yourself. 

This song is about a mother preparing her daughter for some of the goodbyes she must face. Over the years, that song has come to my mind on many occasions. I appreciate the line, "It's okay to hurt." She is letting her child know she can face the hurt and she can survive the hurt. I think that is an important message to pass on to our children. I hope that I have passed that on to mine.

There. That's it. Those were my deep thoughts this week. Just in case you are wondering, I am feeling quite well and do not have any goodbyes planned in my near future. Sometimes stuff just passes through a brain for no particular reason.

How about you? What's been floating through your brain? 


Michelle said...

Sue, I think this is a very important post. I went through a period of my life, in my late teens/early 20s when I withdrew emotionally so far that I realized I was in danger of cutting myself off from any close relationships. I loved my family but did not even want to let that hurt me. I did not want to be touched, either physically or emotionally, because I knew that opened the door to hurt. At that point I made a conscious decision that I did not want my life to be lived that way! No, I did not lose my inborn introversion, but I have been able to open up to really love and be vulnerable. Yes, I've had plenty of pain, but I am so glad I've also had the enrichening love.

Mom said...

You scared me there for a minute! I love you. Mom

Susie said...

Sorry I scared you, silly Mom. I promise if I ever do have scary news, I'd not let you learn of it through my blog.

Sue said...

I surely did not know that about you, Michelle. I'm glad you made that decision. The thing is, if we aren't vulnerable to pain we are going to miss out on all the joy as well.

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